Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
