did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
