when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
This is not my ceiling
I puked a lego.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Of course I have a pirate flag
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
