I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
