You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
