Texts From Last Night

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  (619): View more from California

  I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.

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  (619): I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people. http://tfl.nu/8ypc
  Replies (2) Good night (1262) Bad night (551)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.

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  (918): Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted. (918): And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail. http://tfl.nu/06cg
  Replies (4) Good night (624) Bad night (1655)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"

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  (501): I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay (602): I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay" http://tfl.nu/cfbv
  Replies (20) Good night (4208) Bad night (910)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  I wish life had little blips of pornography

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  (778): I wish life had little blips of pornography http://tfl.nu/kuwx
  Replies (27) Good night (4123) Bad night (1301)
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  (805): View more from California

  the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie

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  (805): the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie http://tfl.nu/n8tx
  Replies (20) Good night (6439) Bad night (921)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...

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  (305): woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"... http://tfl.nu/ev8f
  Replies (5) Good night (3777) Bad night (1248)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order

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  (604): In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order http://tfl.nu/d2l0
  Replies (1) Good night (1242) Bad night (551)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.

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  (573): i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man. http://tfl.nu/t42g
  Replies (2) Good night (643) Bad night (1008)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.

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  (313): We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood. http://tfl.nu/swis
  Replies (4) Good night (711) Bad night (1533)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.

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  (740): Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to. http://tfl.nu/nnoc
  Replies (20) Good night (3717) Bad night (681)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety

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  (401): I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety http://tfl.nu/pik8
  Replies (2) Good night (898) Bad night (434)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...

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  (603): So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment... http://tfl.nu/nl0n
  Replies (2) Good night (694) Bad night (467)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza

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  (908): Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza http://tfl.nu/tg8r
  Replies (1) Good night (822) Bad night (322)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  Fair enough.

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  (860): If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face. (1-860): Fair enough. http://tfl.nu/elro
  Replies (0) Good night (711) Bad night (439)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout

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  (713): Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout http://tfl.nu/4b12
  Replies (1) Good night (309) Bad night (406)

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