i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
