Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
