K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
