I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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