that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
