Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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