I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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