Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
