Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
