are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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