i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
