All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Don't tell me you're on acid again
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