oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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