Texts From Last Night

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  (706): View more from Georgia

  I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.

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  (706): I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor. http://tfl.nu/s5q7
  Replies (21) Good night (1995) Bad night (4326) Order T-Shirt
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...

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  (320): Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting... http://tfl.nu/4ynh
  Replies (23) Good night (1854) Bad night (5224)
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  (310): View more from California

  i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic

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  (310): i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic http://tfl.nu/3sfg
  Replies (5) Good night (2964) Bad night (809) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you

  (917): View more from New York City

  Those had pot in them

  (917): View more from New York City

  And good luck on your interview asshole

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  (917): If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you (917): Those had pot in them (917): And good luck on your interview asshole http://tfl.nu/911g
  Replies (51) Good night (17103) Bad night (1386)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?

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  (803): Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything? http://tfl.nu/hmy2
  Replies (7) Good night (808) Bad night (4375) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it

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  (519): he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it http://tfl.nu/rdxn
  Replies (19) Good night (4931) Bad night (1493) Order T-Shirt
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  (562): View more from California

  Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics

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  (562): Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics http://tfl.nu/ne8m
  Replies (16) Good night (4145) Bad night (736)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.

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  (773): NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU. http://tfl.nu/h1az
  Replies (10) Good night (2170) Bad night (732) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.

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  (610): i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards. http://tfl.nu/8v5s
  Replies (11) Good night (1918) Bad night (442) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here

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  (303): there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here http://tfl.nu/yv0c
  Replies (4) Good night (1057) Bad night (396) Order T-Shirt
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.

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  (757): So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real. http://tfl.nu/gd5o
  Replies (14) Good night (3658) Bad night (615) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better

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  (715): I haven't seen her in ages, how is she? (651): Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better http://tfl.nu/q7yr
  Replies (5) Good night (1981) Bad night (429)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.

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  (602): I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house. http://tfl.nu/wmzr
  Replies (11) Good night (823) Bad night (1045) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Yea. I'm excited about this party too

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  (770): Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand. (678): Yea. I'm excited about this party too http://tfl.nu/ksx0
  Replies (4) Good night (1817) Bad night (350)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today

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  (386): Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today http://tfl.nu/fdks
  Replies (1) Good night (658) Bad night (135) Order T-Shirt

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