just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.