She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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