Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
