On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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