Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize