I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
How many fucks given?
0.12846
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize