yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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