talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
