You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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