I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Sober January is a disaster.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
