only you would photoshop your dick
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
