STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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