There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...