if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse