Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
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