I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
