I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
she looked like the before picture.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
