FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
