Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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