You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
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and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
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I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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