I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I intend to get homeless drunk
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
