I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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