saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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