he wants to bone in the snuggie
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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