are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
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