If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
where are you?
Hypothermia
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm sobbing to NWA
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
