Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
