Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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