woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
