i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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