member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
