i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Randomize