I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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